There are people who find their work to be rewarding. I'm failing to find mine.

The past month, there has been a growing unrest of needless deaths across the states. It seems like once or twice a year, there's a gun crisis, and another year goes by where nothing is done to prevent it from happening again. This leads me to question, how valuable are our lives in the eyes of our government?

Have you ever had a thought and believed it wasn't a big deal? What if you dissected that thought and realized, that maybe there's something worth questioning?

​We've all seen what has been going on this past week. This past forever. Every news coverage reporting the issue on a topic that most want to ignore or deny its existence. I didn't want to speak on it because its not something I think is going to make much of a difference. That the words are just going to fall on deaf ears and it might very well be the case. This is I guess more for my benefit. Its my catharsis I guess. Every black person knows that they are different.  Every person of color knows that they are. We don't understand why, I mean we understand the history of the why but we just don't get WHY. Why is there an us VS them? Why is there this thought still present in peoples mind that we don't belong?

Most of us are taught, but otherwise know that there are people who are going to look at us and or talk to us crooked. We grow up seeing and reading how whites perceive themselves to be the Authority on everything and we are to just accept, we are expected to fall in line and accept it as a rule and then shame on us if we question it.

We know that racism is a generational being. It grows as a family lineage grows and its expected to stop when one lineage sees the damage. With what is happening now, doesn't look like a generational thing. It just looks to be sparked with what's already in their hearts and using it as an excuse that we're threatening and have malice intent. If standing on a corner or in a store waiting for a friend/family member/a date is being threatening, the definition needs to be understood again. If you feel that having  your lungs deprived of air is a necessary source to have us detained, life clearly doesn't matter to you. If you feel that studying quietly in a student lounge of a prestige school or working out at a gym of an apartment building is warranted a question of whether a person belongs there or not, it is not. It doesn't matter. You are not being disturbed. What they are doing is not harming you. These actions does not give you a license to be a private eye investigator. Like Vegas, let it ride.

It's funny how people's reactions are that of surprise. White America is surprise. Black America, minorities, we are erasing the number of days with out incident every-time a new occurrence happens. You would think that these occurrences would be a teaching moment, but we are tired of teaching. We've been tired. Retain the information. Let it marinate in your mind and act accordingly. If I have to hear one more person on the news saying "I'm not a racist", but yet your actions perpetrate that of a racist-- You can only say and do something enough times before an explosion erupts and surprise, surprise there have been major fires everywhere. 

​Bills. Work. Stress. The never-ending headache. Why were we in such a rush to grow up?