Like everyone, I have had thoughts on where I see myself and what I wanted for myself in the long term. These thoughts have not gone through fruition, but if it were I wonder if I would be happy. Probably not, but it makes me wonder what will make me happy?
I came across an article by Darius Foroux called The Purpose of Life is Not Happiness: It's Usefulness. He generally explains that happiness is a by-product and the meaning of life is being useful. Okay, I can see that. I mean, the number one thing people strive for is happiness. Everyone has different goals in life where once reached, they will be happy. For instance, we're told to study hard, go to college, find a good paying job, find someone to spend your life with, get a house and have 2.5 kids. That's it? If life is meant to be filled to the fullest and in doing that means filling it with what makes you happy, then life is just an endless search because no one is ever truly happy.
Happiness is such a fleeting emotion. People have periods of joy in their lives. For me it would be when I saw the R&B group Immature perform a pre-show at the Barnum and Bailey Circus on my 10th or 11th birthday or when my favorite High School English teacher praised me for a short story I wrote. These are short bursts of moments that are good to remember, but not much of a life mattered. Then that's it. Instead of trying to search for happiness, I should be finding a way to make my life matter. How the hell do I do that?
After reflecting on Darius's points I realize what makes my life matter. Its something that I've always done since the age of 8; writing. I enjoy going to museums and movies and getting away from the city to rewind, but creating worlds for my characters to play out gives me peace. I can fail in everything, but my writing makes me feel complete. Out of the writing, I've discovered other creative outlets like baking and building things (I built a bookshelf. It looks awesome and it's not as hard as I thought it would be). In these activities where the few people I've allowed to witness my creativity, are always interested and amazed by what I will come up with next. In that, it keeps me challenged. I keep finding new ways to outdo myself to make my stories better or my deserts tastier.
I agree with Darius's point of living a useful existence. To truly live a happy life, one must find a thing or several things that they believe makes some sort of difference in someone else's life or in their own. What will you do to make yourself useful?
Article by Darius Foroux: The Purpose of Life is Not Happiness: It's Usefulness
Just an introvert sharing her thoughts and interest with the world